Forget about race highlights, as there weren’t any to speak of. OK, that first lap incident which subsequently put paid to 5 cars was pretty Gran Turismo in terms of cinematography, but that alone doesn’t make a race. Which is a bit of a worry/shame, given that if the race-y Spa circuit doesn’t provide a few forest-based thrills and spills, then Formula One is at risk of losing fans who tune in for a bit of wheel-to-wheel action.
So instead, Drivl turns its attentions to the 8 things we learned from the 2018 Belgium GP this afternoon. Which took a while to compile, not because I was spoilt for choice and had to whittle potential events/talking points down to single figures, but because I nearly had to use my imagination and make a few numbers up, such was the dearth of any real action to pass comment or judgement on.
But due to the fact Drivl is nothing if not professional, coupled with the fact I had a spare half hour to kill while my Sunday roast was cooking, I persevered so as to give you the 8 things we learned from the 2018 Belgium GP, found beneath.
Which very nearly included several interesting facts that the Channel 4 team flagged up minutes before lights out. For example, country-specific beer and spa water factoids. Which, again, were far more interesting than the race which followed, unless you were a Ferrari fan. Or simply a person who still gets a boner over Scalextric.
....Celebrates a rousing rendition of the Italian national anthem quite as enthusiastically as the Ferrari F1 team engineers ahead of the podium presentation
....can get more air between himself and the ground beneath than Flying Fernando Alonso. Not even Michael Jordan in his prime
....can stare as intently at a Ferrari F1 car, post-race, as an arms-behind-his-back Lewis Hamilton
....is as exciting as a squeaky team trailer being wheeled behind the Channel 4 F1 presenters during the race post-mortem
....compares to seeing inside the Mercedes SLS AMG safety car for pure excitement during an F1 race
....team is as shit as Williams, not even a re-named Force India starting with zero points pre-race, yet still finishing above them in terms of overall constructor’s points at this stage of the season
....has a sweatier/itchier backside than Hamilton, post-race
....gets paid enough to handle Hamilton’s cool down room towels (please refer to point 6 above)