A Rapier in an age of Musketeers

Reflections on a Porsche

2y ago


I bought a Porsche while my divorce proceedings were ongoing, the other side were trying to portray me as financially profligate, if you look up the word ‘despair’ in the dictionary you’ll see a picture of my lawyer, see ‘glee’ for hers.

A 997 Carrera S, coupe, manual in GT Metallic, 6 years and 60,000 miles later, I've gone through the menoporsche and as Audi age beckons, I reflect on ownership.

I used to park down slight inclines so that when I returned, I'd catch a glimpse of the Pirelli 295/30R19, snuggled together, poised, ready to squeal, I imagine Jay-Z married for similar reasons.

Highlights range from collecting my daughter for the first time to tossing my son the keys and teaching him not to lift mid corner and track days when suddenly everything made sense.

Lows include sitting in the back of an unmarked police car with the officers telling me they felt the breeze as I went past (back to court!). I once went mad and bought snow chains for a trip to the Alps, I believe they’re still available on eBay.

Lessons learned, well the quote from Dudley Moore’s film Crazy People is incorrect “Porsche, it’s a little too small to get laid in... but you get laid the minute you get out”, you don’t, you get laid for helping with the decorating

I’m spiritually richer for having owned a 350 bhp, rear wheel drive, naturally aspirated, manual, before they’re legislated out of existence, I drove a rapier in an age of Musketeers.

My one regret is that my dad never saw it, he owned a Frazer Nash BMW and a Morgan 3 wheeler, I take solace in the fact that my son and daughter have both become motor-heads so maybe the Porsche played some small part.

Would I do it again, yes, without hesitation, in a breath, live recklessly, although always take out the manufacturers optional extended warranty including roadside assist and tyre insurance, oh, and always help with the decorating.

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