Five Cars Santa Might Drive Instead Of His Sleigh
It was the night before Christmas, when all through Drivetribe, a V8 was not stirring, not even a James May jibe... Okay, that was pretty terrible but what would be worse at Christmas time? Here's one: Imagine if Santa's sleigh was broken, the children of the world would cry in despair with no gifts. So, what car would Santa use if he had to? Maybe to hire for the day or even as his new ride, what would he need.
So I broke it down into 5 cars I thought he would use, depending on the different aspects of what we all see Santa as - dashing through the skies, at speed without being seen. Remember - Santa is magical, so he doesn't have to worry about space in the boot. As long as he can get the sack in, all shall be well this holiday.
Speed - The Bentley Continental GT
Santa is a big guy, right? So you can imagine him driving around Christmas Eve night in this very car. He would be so comfortable, he might fall asleep - especially after all those pies. And even if he did, with its massive 6.0-litre W12 engine, he isn't lacking that power he could make all those mile past in the blink of a reindeer's eye. Even on the drive back to the pole, he doesn't even have to use all those pistons either, as the engine can shut down to only six for fuel consumption.
Toughness - The Bowler Defender
Land Rover can survive the harshest of Britain's terrain, so what happens when you take it to the max? Bowler comes to the rescue, to create some of the craziest off-road-racing cars in the world - Most people will remember the Wildcat from Top Gear. Santa would be right at home, using this not just on the roads but also getting to those farming homes, far out in the snowy hills and valleys. With upgrades not just to the engine, suspension and brakes, you also get a luxury interior with heated seats and privacy glass installed - now no one can see what little Timmy has got for the 25th. Clever.
Mysteriousness - The Pagani Huayra
Paganis are a thing of absolute madness and beauty. They are also quite rare and magical themselves and what could be more mystical and unique than the Huayra. There are only 20 BC coupé around and a few of other special, limited edition ones around - yet the numbers are still incredibly small. It would be like Santa, riding a magical mechanical unicorn, that just happens to have four wheels and headlights. Oh, and a twin-turbo V12, just for good measure. A very rare, expensive unicorn.
Size - The Ford Raptor/F150
Santa doesn't need to worry about space for the toys, but he must be doing stuff for the rest of the year surely - so he will need a car that can carry all those elves and Mrs Claus too. Say hello to the Raptor and it's the best selling pick-up truck in the US of A. No wonder either, at 2 meters tall and comes with Fox racing suspension, taking the Claus family around the pole won't be impossible at all and you still have room in the back for the pet polar bear too. Some good news for UK folks too: It's available from Summer 2019. Yay!
Reliablity - Subaru Impreza Wagon
A classic for the angry yob but also a classic, hard-working car all-round. I have never met anyone from the UK Subaru owners clubs, that had one die on them. Since 1992, the Impreza has made waves in Japan, the USA and Europe - a hard-wearing sporty car for the masses. How could you go wrong? Make it an estate normally does make it a flop, but with the Wagon, they really hit home with owners and Petrolheads alike. Santa would see this and think it's useful, then turns the key to find out that this car is more than meets the eye. All I want for Christmas is a first-gen WRX STI - in red.
So, that is five cars Santa could use if the sleigh was 'indisposed'. A sleigh is a bit outdated really, it's nearly 2019. Ah well, time for my 34th mince pie.