Happy Birthday To...

There's a birthday afoot...

3y ago

I may seem like either a complete oddball or a miserable old bastard for saying this, but if there's one day a year I detest more than any other, it's my birthday. My hatred for it comes from a lifelong loathing for fuss, parties, and celebration directed at me. Some may see this as an incredibly negative way to view people who want to do something generous for me – but when you actually pick apart the psychology behind why people do things for you on your birthday, you begin to realise why it's better to have nothing at all.

People go through life looking for any old excuse to throw a party, and get pissed out of their skull. People like an excuse to celebrate, and because they're narrow minded, they decide that it is the law that everybody enjoys celebrating because they aren't able to disassociate celebration from enjoyment. At parties, people will tell you to "just enjoy yourself" - the best answer to which, for me, is to proceed straight to the exit.

If people really care about what you want, they would bless you with the gift of listening. In other words, if you say you don't want anything, you mean you don't want anything, so they shouldn't do or buy anything for you. It is the simplest of simple tasks to accomplish, yet in practise it appears to be a challenge ranked on the difficulty scale somewhere between ophthalmic surgery and teleporting to Pluto. And there's a very good reason why it's so hard for people to listen...

The harsh truth of the matter is that people buy you gifts more for their own satisfaction than yours. A present is merely their way of appeasing the guilt they'd feel if they actually listened to what you really wanted, meaning their gift is for them and not for you.

There is an easy way around this however: don't tell anyone when your birthday is. If they don't know when it is, they can't ruin it for you. This is something I've put into practice, and so far, it's working nicely. So, you're probably aware now that this blog is not in fact to do with my own birthday, and you'd be right. My tribe on the other hand is 1 year old next week!

DriveTribe itself recently celebrated its first birthday, and now it's my tribe's turn. My tribe started out by being called "The Pure Approach", and if you can remember that, then I must thank you for sticking around all this time. It then had a brief spell being called "In Search For Speed", before I finally settled on the "Speed Machines" name and identity it has today.

Since my earliest blogs however, my tribe has seen exponential growth, thanks to a number of special individuals whom I am infinitely grateful to (you know who you are). Given the followers I have at present, I feel the best way I can celebrate my tribe's birthday is to re-publish some of the first blogs I wrote, which as a result of my members not reaching double digits, didn't perform particularly well. With the larger audience I have now, I'd like to see if they'd receive any more recognition.

So, tomorrow, I'll be publishing the very first blog I ever posted to DriveTribe, followed by some key ones from the early days, everyday, for the next week. For my scheduled "The Trouble With..." blog on a Friday, I'll be posting the first ever "The Trouble With..." blog I ever produced.

If you're fairly new around here, you'll be wise to stick around to see what's coming; it'll sure be easier than scrolling back through the 300+ blogs I've published since.

Stay tuned, and I hope you all enjoy!


Twitter: @AngeloUccello

Tribe: Speed Machines

Facebook: Speed Machines - DriveTribe

Banner Credit: planwallpaper

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Comments (6)

  • Nobody knows when my birthday is and I like it to be a perfectly normal day too. People do struggle to accept that, like they struggle when you suggest we just forget birthdays all together - this ridiculous tradition of only ever seeing people when you’ve had to spend money on them, which you do grudge! It’s a social construct I’m happy to bow out of

    On the other hand, I can’t think of a better way to celebrate the birthday of Speed Machines and I look forward to revisiting your posts, time permitting ☺️

      3 years ago
    • Precisely. It's a social construct, and one that I really don't think I'll ever understand the appeal of. I've always felt the same sort of distaste for clubbing. I only ever went once for a friend's 21st (after being emotionally...

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        3 years ago
  • I love all of this! Parties are the worst; I'd much rather go build something with a mate. Congratulations on your Tribe's success, your tenacity and content quality make Speed Machines an easy join.

      3 years ago
  • I look forward to reading your upcoming blog posts. I am also glad you went with speed machines ... it sounds so cool. I do not celebrate my birthday. It was let down as a child having a party with a dozen kids you didn't even know. It was like something out of the Twilight Zone. I only had one birthday party growing up, and honestly that was enough. I am not a party person, and can totally understand how you feel about it.

      3 years ago
    • Thanks a lot mate :). I remember my one and only birthday party - my 6th - was a bit like that. Mum inviting the children of people she once brushed tummies with while on an exercise ball at a pre-natal class, resulting in me tugging on her hand...

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        3 years ago