James May likes car poetry, I like car hip-hop
So, long and the short of it, I like rap music. Real rap music. The one with lyrics in it. Actual words with an actual meaning. I dislike trap and dislike mumble rap, I like good rap, ol' school rap.
I started writing specifically about cars 10 years ago but I'd been writing long before that. I began with rap lyrics. I was 14 or 15, in school, and I that's what I was doing, pretty much all day long. So for the first time ever, in front of you, my fellow Drivetribers, I've decided I might try and mix these two things. This is the first ever automotive rap:
No Chevy Corvette / this is a green-ish car world.
No Merc G Landaulet / or Cobra and Roush Ford.
No more V8s / V12s, H2O the last word.
No more popcorn sound / it's infotainment passwords.
Green bus, Lyft, Greyhound / even Alfa is no more.
I can't drive into city centres / might as well catch an Uber.
Driving ain't getting better / the L now stands for loser.
No fizz / no spark in our cars / might as well drink a soda.
G-Wiz / Smart cars in car parks / might as well drive a Rover.
No G Wagon or supercars / might wanna sell the Range Rover.
No styling / Cars all look the same like goats, meese or sheep.
Hardwired / faith in self-driving / might as well fall asleep.
Saw a Kadjar or something-other / couldn't tell, though.
Might be a Qashqai or a Yugo Skala / couldn't call it "bello".
Not every car looks good in red or yellow.
No engines bellow / horrid body shapes.
Then euro ncap gives you A-Grades.
Media say fun is over / you call them naysayers.
Go and get that crossover / like salesmen of MASHRAE
All I know is that the Lexus is only good if it's an LFA.