Meet the Drivetriber - Jared Unger

5w ago

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Meet the Drivetriber is amazingly back in perfect timing with a new interview! Today's guest is sort of special, but before introducing him to you, the usual reminder about this series of posts.

Meet the Drivetriber is a series of interviews, made to give to anyone the occasion to have a closer look at all the amazing people part of this community, anyone can be part of it, simply leaving a comment down this post.

A more accurate explanation can be found here.

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Today I'm going to ask some questions to Jared Unger, tribe leader of The Driving Bee, the satire magazine of Drivetribe, Thoughts of a Redneck and Redneck world, I'll let you guess what they're about! Obviously, you don't have to be a redneck for joining, so if you want some fun stuff, join them all!

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I'm very happy to have Jared as a guest in this series of posts, he's one of the first persons I talked with here on Drivetribe, I can't remember precisely about what, maybe was about the risk to be mistaken for an @rse#ol€ if you use sarcasm. Anyway was a funny conversation and it made me feel very welcomed around here!

Now let's start with the questions!

Where are you from?

I was born and raised in Battle Ground, Washington in the good ol U.S of A. I spent most of my childhood running around on farms and in the woods of Southern Washington and Northern Oregon. I lived in Spokane, Washington for a little less than a year. I currently live in Newport, Rhode Island.

What do you do?

I currently serve in the US Coast Guard, one of the five branches of the Armed Forces of the United States.

How did you join Drivetribe?

I joined Drivetribe way back when it first started (I think it was two years ago). I saw an ad on Facebook with Jeremy Clarkson and figured I’d try it out. And here I still am, posting ridiculous thoughts and jokes.

What started your passion for cars?

That’s kind of a long story. When I was about three, my father had a green 1973 Plymouth Duster. He would spend many hours during the weekends working on that “money bucket with a whole in the bottom” as he referred to it years later. I distinctly remember my spending the days with my father in the garage working on it, holding the flashlight for him, and getting yelled at for not shining it in the right place. After dad got rid of the Duster, he continued to do small repair jobs on the family vehicles to save money, I would help him when he did all throughout my childhood. That sold me on cars. I loved working on them and found their parts so intricate and amazing. I repaired my sister’s brakes singlehandedly at eleven and rebuilt the engine to my 02 Mazda Tribute at 19. This made me love cars even more.

What's your daily drive?

I currently drive a 2001 Silver Ford Explorer XE. It’s not very quick, gets poor gas mileage, desperately needs an alignment. I’ve only had it for six months, so I don’t know what I think about it yet. It’s gone on a few fishing trips with me, so it handles okay off road. I’ll know what I think about it come November when I drive 1000 miles to southern Virginia.

What's your favorite classic car?

That’s a difficult question. There are so many good options to choose from. I love pretty much anything American made. I’d have to go with 1968 Ford Torino. It’s got a great muscle car look and a classic feel to it.

What's your favorite modern car?

Probably the current model of the Ford F-350. I’ve seen first hand what that truck is capable of and it’s freaking awesome!

What do you think of autonomous vehicles?

They’re dumb and people need to stop thinking that they can happen. Nothing replaces a person behind the wheel vs a machine. You can’t program a machine to be a human. Anyone who thinks that has seen I-Robot and 2001 Space Odyssey one too many times.

And what about electric cars?

They need to crawl back in the hell hole from which they came. They are evil little silent demons.

I don't dare to ask you about cyclists!

You’re going to get an answer anyways. Cyclists are skinny mafia who threaten you with lawsuits if you get within 18 miles of them and need to buy a car. If you want to get fit and exercise, jog, or get a gym membership.

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Ouch! Did I told you that I am a cyclist? Anyway...

If you were a car, what car would you be?

Probably a rusty old Ford F100. I’m a grumpy old soul.

Tell us a song that you enjoy to listen while driving

Any song by Merle Haggard, Willie Nelson, Johnny Cash, David Allen Coe, or George Strait.

I'm going to pick my favorite by the Man in Black then...

Tell us something funny that's happened to you in a car

I don’t remember this, but when I was a baby, I got a hold of the diaper rash cream from the diaper bag. I then promptly began to spread it all over myself and the backseat of my oldest sister’s Toyota Camry. My sister tells me I was a very slippery and greasy baby. According to her, she was not happy.

Tell us a car related misadventure

I’ve already posted this on Drivetribe, but there was that one time I was a STUPID BOY and got my finger lodged in the hole where you put the gas nozzle. I was stuck there for good two hours and it was not fun.

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What are your hobbies?

I like to work on cars, fish, backpack, and frequent a local dive bar. Usually all of these include my tobacco pipe accompanied by a good bourbon or stout.

What's your dream road trip?

I have a road trip planned to hit all lower 48 states and have a beer in every single one. It would take me about 2 months as I would want to stop in a few places that sound fun to me.

It's true that anything can be fixed with duct tape?

No. There are some things that require the use of WD40 to be fixed. If it should move and doesn’t: WD40. If it moves and shouldn’t duct tape. If that doesn’t work, you aren’t using enough.

Is sarcasm underrated? And there's place for it in the automotive world?

Yes, sarcasm is underrated. It can go anywhere and everywhere. But I do think it can be overused by people who don’t know what their doing.

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Am I asking too many questions?

I don’t know, you’re the one who sent this to me. You tell me.

Yeah so...there are a few more!

Are you a Motorsport fan?

Define Motorsport. I like NASCAR and Rallycross. I despise F1. It looks stupid, especially with all their rules. NASCAR used to not have many rules, but it's kind of going south in that regard. Get rid of most of the rules that have been put in place and I think F1 and NASCAR would be especially fun to watch.

Who is your favorite racing driver?

It was Jeff Gordon before he retired, I don’t know what I think about others now. It’s hard to find a good racer that I like.

Pick a co-driver, Clarkson, Hammond or may?

Hammond hands down. I need a short sidekick.

What's your first Clarkson and Co memory?

I was probably eleven at my best friend’s house for a few weeks and they turned on Top Gear. I was hooked. 

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What do you think of Drivetribe?

It’s alright. I think there could be better ways to help the little man or maybe streamline genres and groups together. But it’s a fun place for me to put stupid jokes that my family and friends would otherwise hear and groan at.

Thanks for reading and a big thanks to Jared for be so kind and reply to all of my questions!

Meet the Drivetriber will be back on Friday, as usual here on Tribeys!

If you missed the previous interviews, you can find them down here!

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