Ruined. But brilliant.

There's going to be shouting when Audi come to collect their R8

I'm hiding behind my desk to post this. The man from Audi is coming to collect their R8 Spyder V10 this afternoon and I've ruined it. I didn't know it was so popular with birds, so when I parked it under a tree last night I wasn't to know that every winged creature within a hundred miles would flock to it and deposit a symbol of their love and admiration on it.

The thing is, not so long ago, I might've been tempted to join in. I've never liked the R8, never been comfortable with the whole 'everyday supercar' thing. Who wants an 'everyday' supercar? It's supposed to be a special occasion. But I was wrong. Over the last week I have driven some pretty exotic and special machinery on our track and after every occasion I have hopped back into the Audi's cabin where the emphasis is clearly on luxury rather than spartan, track day heroics and realised what all the fuss has been about. The 5.2-litre V10 makes a howl that is both velvety and frantic, the whole drivetrain is sorted and clever and grown up; sophisticated is what it is. This is not the sort of car where you would go without aircon and leather to save weight on the track: It's about keeping all the luxuries but making them go as fast as they can.

The Virtual Cockpit Display is a masterpiece and all the more impressive because it's lodged in the leather-lined cabin of a V10-engined supercar that looks perfectly at home smeared in the inevitable grime of a 130 mile commute.

It feels good, suddenly tuning in to something you've misunderstood for so long. So whilst yes, I am hiding under my desk to avoid the poor chap despatched to collect a hundred and fifty grand car now weighed down under half a ton of bird manure, a part of me wants to go and lie down in front of it and stop him taking it away. It's an 'every day supercar' but it still feels special. Like an 'every day party' and who doesn't want that?

To my eyes, even in green, it looks all the more heroic for being used hard

To my eyes, even in green, it looks all the more heroic for being used hard

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Comments (125)

  • Talk about muck for luck! You must be due tons of it after all that....luck that is 😉

      3 years ago
  • I think for most people who would buy a supercar with their life savings, an everyday super car would be ideal. As it sounds reliable and well balanced. But for multimillionaires (with 30 car garages and a different super car for each day of the month) it may sound drab and unappealing.... If only one day i could think ANY, super car in my possession was unappealing. Maybe then...I'd be richard hammond.

      2 years ago
  • I've seen far worse on cars left parked outside Rugby clubs

      3 years ago
  • Hammond, you're slowly turning into May. Next you'll be telling us how brilliant brown Volvo's are. Or how much you hate the Nurburgring.

      3 years ago
  • So someone gave you a free car to drive and you ruined it.

    Well that'll be a first. Nearly.

      3 years ago