I'm hiding behind my desk to post this. The man from Audi is coming to collect their R8 Spyder V10 this afternoon and I've ruined it. I didn't know it was so popular with birds, so when I parked it under a tree last night I wasn't to know that every winged creature within a hundred miles would flock to it and deposit a symbol of their love and admiration on it.
The thing is, not so long ago, I might've been tempted to join in. I've never liked the R8, never been comfortable with the whole 'everyday supercar' thing. Who wants an 'everyday' supercar? It's supposed to be a special occasion. But I was wrong. Over the last week I have driven some pretty exotic and special machinery on our track and after every occasion I have hopped back into the Audi's cabin where the emphasis is clearly on luxury rather than spartan, track day heroics and realised what all the fuss has been about. The 5.2-litre V10 makes a howl that is both velvety and frantic, the whole drivetrain is sorted and clever and grown up; sophisticated is what it is. This is not the sort of car where you would go without aircon and leather to save weight on the track: It's about keeping all the luxuries but making them go as fast as they can.
The Virtual Cockpit Display is a masterpiece and all the more impressive because it's lodged in the leather-lined cabin of a V10-engined supercar that looks perfectly at home smeared in the inevitable grime of a 130 mile commute.
It feels good, suddenly tuning in to something you've misunderstood for so long. So whilst yes, I am hiding under my desk to avoid the poor chap despatched to collect a hundred and fifty grand car now weighed down under half a ton of bird manure, a part of me wants to go and lie down in front of it and stop him taking it away. It's an 'every day supercar' but it still feels special. Like an 'every day party' and who doesn't want that?