- Ever wanted to beat this car?

SO, YOU WANT TO MAKE THE WORLD'S FASTEST PRODUCTION CAR?

1y ago

1.8K

So, are you the owner of a niche car company in the middle of nowhere, trying desperately to put your company on the map? Are you tired of people not knowing what your company makes, if they even know the name of your startup? Why not try to beat the world's fastest production car? After all, the record set by some Bugatti is just 267 MPH, and I'm pretty sure your small team of brilliant engineers can beat a well funded car company.

Are you on board? Great! Here's the criteria.

IT HAS TO BE AVAILABLE TO THE PUBLIC

Of course, once you effortlessly obliterate the record set by that fat Volkswagen, everyone would want your new record setter. Sure, it's going to cost more than a house, 10 Ferrari's, and what Britain used to send to the EU, but who cares if you can get breakneck speeds for the easy price of $$$?

A future customer, perhaps?

IT HAS TO TRANSPORT PEOPLE

People, not person.

Of course, someone out there has balls large enough to take your car all the way to its top speed, and its your job to make sure that he/she does hit that top speed, he/she survives to tell the tale to your new adoring fans, and that he/she can take a gullible passenger to scare the life out of from, because everyone likes a good laugh.

Who says there's only space for 2 people?

FIRST 2 CRITERIA MET? GOOD!

THERE HAS TO BE MORE THAN 25 CARS

When everyone catches news of your new record setting car, you have to be ready for all the new requests that will be piling up on your table once the order books open. Of course, there has to be more than 25 of your car made for it to be a production car. Not a problem for your team of 40 engineers, right?

There's definitely more than 25 cars here. (Bonus: spot the F40 with its lights off)

IT HAS TO BE STREET LEGAL

Of course, whoever is lucky enough to own one of the 25 cars you're making has to be able to take it out on the Autobahn, record it all, and post it on the internet for immediate internet fame! But first, your car has to be suitable for daily use. Sure, it might be a horrible daily driver, but who cares when it's the fastest car in the world? It's not like they'll even consider driving it, anyway.

IT ACTUALLY HAS TO HIT ITS TOP SPEED

Who would've thought?!

What do you mean you don't need a high speed run?!

For everyone to believe that your car can bend the laws of physics to its own will, it actually has to bend physics to its own will. Your high speed run is to be done twice in 2 directions, with the average of those 2 runs being taken as your top speed. For that run, you're going to need a stretch of road long enough, a representative from Guinness to verify your run to glory, and a large crowd for publicity purposes.

For a point of reference, here's Captain Slow going not so slow:

SO, YOU'VE DONE EVERYTHING?

CONGRATULATIONS, YOU BUILT THE WORLD'S FASTEST CAR!

NOW BASK IN YOUR NEWFOUND GLORY!

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