The 50 worst car names of all time
Let's turn the clocks back and witness some weird car names!!
These days, the car industry is littered with bizarre and difficult-to-pronounce names. No self-respecting Crossover leaves a showroom without a random group of letters worthy of a double-word score on Scrabble. Here, let's look at some(50) of the worst names from motoring history. From a £2.5M fully electric modern Japanese supercar to an 80 year old very popular "Economy British car" that then costed about £130
1. Aspark Owl
Japanese manufacturer Aspark claims its new fully-electric Owl is the fastest-accelerating production car in the world, capable of 0-62mph in 1.69s. It has a range of almost 280 Miles, a 248Mph top speed and total power of over 2,000HP. On-road testing is underway and the 50-car production run is all set to commence. What’s not to like? Well, there are a few questions I have around calling a world-beating hypercar ‘Owl’.
And to continue the wildlife theme…......
2. Nikola Badger
American truck company Nikola is pushing ahead with a new pick-up. Powered by electric batteries or a hydrogen fuel cell (with up to 906HP!), it’s a fiendishly clever piece of kit. Sadly, its name–Badger–conjures up images of small animals squashed at the roadside.
3. Skoda Enyaq
Skoda says the name of its new Enyaq electric crossover is derived from the Irish ‘Enya’, meaning ‘Source of life’. That’s as maybe, but as a name for a car, let's wish it would sail away, sail away, sail away…....
What were they thinking?? The Ford Probe! Really, Ford?! REALLY?!!
5. Great Wall Wingle
Head over to the Urban Dictionary to discover why Wingle isn’t a great name for a supposedly butch pick-up. (Be brave!)
6. Daihatsu Applause
The Daihatsu Applause was little more than a mediocre car of the 1990s. Probably worthy of a slow hand clap, but a round of applause? Nope.
7. Ford Aspire
Would anyone really 'aspire' to owning a car that looked like this? Of course they wouldn’t, so put away the book of motivational speaking, Ford.
8. Renault Wind
Only the Brits would find this amusing. The idea of a car called the Wind appeals to our end-of-the-pier sense of humour.
9. Ferrari LaFerrari
Even Ferrari can get it wrong. Essentially, this is called the ‘Ferrari The Ferrari’. It’s the kind of stunt you’d expect from a cosmetics firm. Not Ferrari.
10. Honda Lagreat
Ah, that’s better. Give yourself a pat on the back if you owned a Honda Lagreat(Known in the UK as the Shuttle) and called it Alexander.
11. Isuzu Mysterious Utility Wizard
The ‘MU’ in Isuzu MU stands for Mysterious Utility. Quite where the Wizard bit came from is anyone’s guess. Sadly, in the UK they had to make do with the Vauxhall Frontera.
12. Daihatsu Naked
What do Avril Lavigne, Leona Lewis, Neneh Cherry, Reef and the Spice Girls all have in common? They’ve all written a song about the Daihatsu Naked. True dat.
13. Peugeot Moonster
It’s a crazy concept, so we can kind of excuse the stupid name. But Moonster, really? Next you’ll be telling us about a Skoda Roomster. Oh, wait…...
14. Honda Joy Machine
In order to appeal to a younger audience, Honda marketed the original HR-V as the Joy Machine. And you thought a Joy Machine was something you ordered from Ann Summers.
15. Datsun Fairlady
The Datsun Fairlady. Named in honour of a musical starring Audrey Hepburn. Probably.
16. Kia Provo
Kia has given the world some pretty cool motor show concept cars in recent years. But the marketing team should have spent some time on Wikipedia before settling on this name.
17. Yamaha Pantryboy Supreme(No photo available>:( )
It’s easy to find the Yamaha Pantryboy Supreme. Just take a look down aisle three, in the baking section, next to the ready-roll pastry.
18. Suzuki Every Landy
The Suzuki Every was bad enough. But with the Suzuki Every Landy, you’re really spoiling us.
19. Mazda Bongo Friendee
Ah, everyone’s favourite stupid car name. The Mazda Bongo Friendee can often be seen surrounded by a haze of blue smoke in your local Morrisons car park.
20. Honda Life Dunk
Well slam dunk the funk, it’s the Honda Life Dunk. Yep, we can rap with the best of them.
21. Geely Beauty Leopard
The Geely Beauty Leopard. Not to be confused with Brian Fantana’s Sex Panther "Eau De Cologne"–60% of the time, it works every time.
22. Isuzu Bighorn
You can understand why Isuzu would want to associate their rugged off-roader with a US canyon. But it kind of gets lost in translation. Hey, can anyone remember where I parked my Bighorn??
23. Oldsmobile Achieva
Straight out of the middle management textbook. The perfect car for over Achievas–it’s the new Oldsmobile.
24. Nissan Hardbody
Again, this probably sounded sensible in the focus group. But announcing over dinner that you’ve just bought a Hardbody may result in a few titters.
25. Vauxhall Movano and Vivaro
Vauxhall had clearly been watching too much of Vic and Bob’s Shooting Stars when they came up with the Movano and Vivaro names.
26. Nissan Cedric
Rumour has it the Nissan Cedric was going to be called the Nissan Terry in the UK….........
27. Nissan Gloria
And the Nissan Gloria would have been called the Nissan June.
28. Growler E
Top Gear’s favourite:- The Growler. And you thought the Swiss didn’t have a sense of humour.
29. Subaru Brat
The Subaru Brat was fine until they damaged the bodywork. Then it became a "Spoiled Brat".
30. Honda That’s
Is that your car? No, That’s my car. Oh well, never mind…......
31. Mitsubishi Mighty Max
The L200 was known as the Mighty Max in some markets. You just know that someone called Mighty Max wouldn’t have been mighty at all. Mind you, Mitsubishi also gave the world some more hopelessly named cars😬.
32. Mitsubishi Mini Active Urban Sandal
Succinctness has clearly never been a strength of Mitsubishi’s product naming department-the Active Urban Sandal does also sound like its’ coming soon to a Lululemon store near you.
33. Mitsubishi Mum 500 Shall We Join Us
When Lamborghini runs out of heroic bulls after which to knight its new supercars, it could learn a thing or two from this three-cylinder Mitsubishi micro-car(Rolls right off the tongue)
34. Nissan Micra Wave
Whatever Nissan does in the future, it can never be excused for giving the world the Nissan Micra Wave. #FacePalm🤦♂️.
35. Mitsubishi Carisma
The Mitsubishi Miserable. The Mitsubishi Charmless. The Mitsubishi Soulless. The Mitsubishi Drizzle. The Mitsubishi Doldrums. Five names more appropriate than the Mitsubishi Carisma.
36. Volkswagen Thing
To be fair, the Volkswagen Thing should be filed under good names. “I’m just off for a drive in the Thing, darling.” Yep, that’s cool.
37. Austin Chummy
The Chummy. Words fail us.
38. Mazda Scrum Truck
The Scrum Truck. It’s hard as nails, but it smells of sweat and you wouldn’t want to get stuck in the middle of one.
39. Mazda Bongo Brawny
The Bongo Brawny. Mazda, are you on a quest to dominate this gallery? If so, you’re doing a pretty good job!
40. Mazda Proceed Marvie Wild Breeze
Sorry, but now you’re just being silly. The Mazda Proceed Marvie Wild Breeze?! You’re just putting names in a hat and pulling them out one by one, aren’t you??
41. Mitsubishi Pistachio
The Mitsubishi Pistachio. You’d have to be nuts to think that name was a good idea.
42. Lancia Dedra
Top tip-You might want to avoid names that sound like dead. The Lancia Deirdre would have been better, marginally.
43. Kia Sportage
It might not be the worst offender, but when you take a step back and think about it, Sportage sounds like the name of a really cheap and foul smelling body spray you might buy from a budget supermarket.
44. Ford Pampa
In the Ford marketing meeting, naming a pick-up after the vast plains of South America might have seemed like a good idea. In reality, it makes it sound like a disposable nappy.
45. Mazda LaPuta
Congrats for another shitty car name Mazda. LaPuta may not seem bad, but a Top Tip-Never hire one in a Spanish-speaking nation. Mazda engineers need to spend more time on Google now!
46. Renault LeCar
LaFerrari case, only happened about 25 years back. '‘Can you go move The Car into the driveway?’ ‘Which car?’ ‘The Car!’ ‘But which one?!’' Welp, you get it now.
47. Mitsubishi Minica Lettuce
We have to wonder what other leaves the executives had on hand when they decided this version of the Minica should be named after a salad base/ something that would end between 2 slices of bread.
48. Honda Vamos Hobio Travel Dog
Honda’s 2003, 3 cylinder micro-van was trumpeted as the world’s first dog-friendly small utility vehicle. In hindsight, it’s probably no surprise it was also the world’s last.
49. Mitsubishi Minica Winky
Proudly displayed on Mitsubishi's stand at the 1985 Tokyo Motor Show was a microcar called the Minica Winky. Nudgy-nudgy.
50. Porsche Panamera Turbo 4S E-Hybrid Sport Turismo 10 Years Edition
Sorry, just let me catch my breath.
And that ends this loooooooooooooong list of hilarious and shitty names?? What in your opinion is the worst car name ever?? Lemme know in the comments!!!
That's all for now. Thanks for reading and see ya!!😁