The Trouble With Modern Ferraris
SOrry - but Ferraris aren't perfect. But hold your prancing horses, because I'm not criticising them in a way that will mortally offend you.
I'm going to receive death threats for this one: daring to insinuate that Ferraris today are anything less than perfection! Well hold your prancing horses, because I'm not going to be extending my critique to any areas that may irk the triggered.
The driving experience a Ferrari offers goes without question or doubt at its magnificence. But in order to drive a Ferrari, you need to be inside of it – and that's where you'll find yourself complaining, and above everything else, massively confused.
The first thing you'll notice as you step inside is a steering wheel that appears to have been designed by someone who sneezes switches. The engine start button, the traction control, the headlight settings, the window-washers, the damper modes, the indicators, the phone buttons, and of course, the horn are all operated from the steering wheel – which, just in case any of you need reminding, is an object that moves. It really is like playing upper-class Bop-It!
Once you've managed to fathom the steering wheel – a job that should take you no longer than 4 or 5 years – you'll then progress onto the infotainment system. After about 10 minutes, you'll end up going in search of a DIY store in order to purchase a hammer so you can hit it. But Ferrari being Ferrari, they foresaw this, and made the navigation system so unintelligible, that you can’t program it to find said DIY store to buy said hammer to use for said repair work.
Some Ferraris come with an interior feature that is purely for the passenger's entertainment: a speedometer and rev-counter directly ahead of them in the dash. Had I seen such an instrument when I was a child, I would’ve inevitably felt sensations I wouldn’t have understood back then. The problem is though, if you find yourself with a child in the passenger seat - your own child, hopefully - you will soon realise that kids have an annoying habit in which they look with their hands and not their eyes. And that's especially a problem in the GTC4Lusso, as the passenger display can also be used to operate the infotainment system.
This means that the little darling in the passenger seat will soon begin to play a game called "let's see if I can make Daddy glow red with anger as I scroll through every radio station that's currently broadcasting on planet earth". And of course, because the child has youth on their side, they will miraculously be able to operate the wretched system that you cannot!
It's at this point that you'll go looking for the illusive DIY store again, in pursuit of buying an even bigger hammer, with the same objective of fixing a problem, and venting rage.
But while these problems are important if you're lucky enough to own a Ferrari, and therefore have the opportunity to use it everyday, Ferraris are of course for driving, and the experience they deliver is one that easily purges your will to complain about any niggles. While they can drive you mad, they can also drive you to automotive heaven.
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Written by: Angelo Uccello
Tribe: Speed Machines
Facebook: Speed Machines – DriveTribe
Photo credits: NetCarShow