Uber Sexy: We'll Be Making Luurrrve More Often In Autonomous Cars

Self-driving cars better come with condom dispensers...

2y ago

Driverless cars will make it easier for you to get it onnnnn. The Annals of Tourism journal has published what might be the most obvious study ever, as bored passengers will almost immediately think of getting jiggy in a Jetta, or doing it themselves on the dual carriageway.

No longer will forest car parks will be used for saucy late-night encounters. You might end up seeing cars bouncing down the highway, with steamed up windows and Stevie Wonder filling the air. If cars have windows by then, that is.

Of course, when autonomous cars become common, we’ll be doing more of all sorts. We’ll be eating in cars more, and sleeping on the road too. Some people may even spend their time productively. But those people eating and sleeping in cars could have an effect on restaurants and hotels.

Hey Google, order some more Vaseline!

Hey Google, order some more Vaseline!

Actually, think about it and hotels are worse off twice. With self-driving cars, it’s highly likely that they’ll be used more often for prostitution – just set the Uber to drive around the block for an hour (or a few minutes), and you’ve no need to book an expensive boutique hotel/ seedy motel. It’ll make it harder for the authorities to crack down on it, and there’ll probably an app to track down your city’s mobile red light district.

Lead author Scott Cohen told Fast Company, “You can see the long association of automobiles and sex that’s represented in just about every coming-of-age movie. It’s not a big leap.”

That breeds a slightly odd thought. Hose-down interiors might be way more common, and the options lists might be full of sex toys and condom subscriptions. There’ll be even more black leather available…

“Of course sex sells,” Cohen adds, “and there’s likely to be a capitalization on this in terms of commercial interest.”

Are you looking forward to self-driving sex booths?

Let me know in the comments! (Unless you make it super weird)

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Comments (11)

  • That's the first actually possible benefit of those fucking electirc / autonomous cars. See what I did there?

      2 years ago
  • Does this mean VW will make an autonomous Rabbit for single ladies.

      2 years ago
  • Welp. never thought of it this way.

      2 years ago
  • I honestly can't wait to see one of them in the middle of the task about to... Then the car has a hiccup, nearly drives into a pole both the whore and the guy freak out and ends up coming by the nervousness... Yeah truly hillarious.

      2 years ago